How to Make Bold Decisions Without Falling Into the Perfectionism Trap

When faced with a decision, are you willing to take the necessary risks or “playing it safe”? If it’s the latter, you're not alone. Many leaders struggle with the weight of responsibility and the anxiety that comes with making bold choices.

I recently sat down with Laura J. Hay, Board Director for MetLife and former Global Head of Insurance for KPMG, whose approach to decision-making offers a refreshing perspective. Laura and I were introduced by a mutual friend, Janine Sarna-Jones, CPO®, SMM-C, who thought we’d hit it off (and she was right!). The more I learned about Laura’s professional journey, the more impressed I became, and I knew I wanted to share her valuable insights with you.  Learning to become more comfortable taking measured risks is at the top of many leaders' minds—it’s something several clients are grappling with right now—and I know Laura’s unique and empowering approach to making bold decisions will resonate with you

Take a leap of faith.

When decisions must be made, it’s not uncommon for leaders to wrestle with self-doubt and a fear of failure. These feelings are often rooted in perfectionism, one of life’s most destructive forces, a trap that can make leaders afraid to act, afraid to fail, and ultimately, afraid to grow. Laura doesn’t mince words about the damage it causes: “Perfectionism is the enemy of confidence,” she says.

Laura argues that leaders must confront fear and self-doubt head-on, embracing a mindset of intentional decision-making. This is about making choices and leading with conviction, even in the face of uncertainty. "Indecision is the worst kind of decision," she asserts. Avoiding something doesn’t make the problem disappear; it compounds it. Leaders who stall or dodge decisions fail their teams, undermining trust and momentum. Instead, Laura champions deliberate risk-taking, especially when those choices defy expectations or venture into uncharted territory.

To prepare to make intentional choices, Laura advises reflecting on core values, gathering input from trusted sources, and considering the decision's broader implications. While tools like pro-con lists or mentor advice are helpful, they can only take you so far. “At the end of the day, there’s always an element of leaping and taking a chance,” she says.

Ask yourself: Am I letting the fear of failure keep me from making decisions that could move my team forward?

Building confidence in small doses.

Many leaders hesitate to take risks because of a lack of confidence; according to a 2022 KPMG Women’s Leadership Report only 49% of respondents self-identified as confident! So how can leaders become more self-assured if it’s not their natural inclination?

Confidence is not a fixed trait; it ebbs and flows depending on circumstances. For Laura, confidence is closely tied to action, the compounding of small, deliberate actions that stretch one’s comfort zone. Speaking up earlier in meetings, voicing an unpopular opinion, or even choosing a prominent seat at the table are steps toward reclaiming authority and presence. Every risk—successful or not—strengthens a leader’s ability to handle complexity and ambiguity. Even failure has value. It provides lessons can strengthen future decisions. This is how leaders grow: not by avoiding risk but by stepping into it.

To combat self-doubt, Laura suggests these practical strategies:

• Turn to your allies: The people who put you in your role have confidence in your ability to lead. “Leveraging that supportive management can really help you in your journey as you go along the way.”

• Acknowledge your negative inner voice: “Name the gremlin that’s speaking up,” she says, but don’t let it live in your head rent-free. Instead, “get the cranky roommate back in the room.”

• Put a time limit on self-doubt: Sometimes, you have no choice but to live with your feelings for a bit. However, Laura recommends putting a time limit on it. “Say, ‘okay, for 10 minutes I'm going to feel everything I want to feel about it. And then at the end of the 10 minutes, I'm going to come out of this.’ And usually when I do that, I don't even need the full time.”

Ask yourself: What small, deliberate action can I take today to build my confidence?

Reckless vs. risky leadership

The distinction between taking risks and being reckless lies in thoughtfully assessing potential outcomes and seeking diverse input before acting. She contrasts this with recklessness, which she defines as operating in isolation or surrounding oneself with only like-minded individuals to avoid dissent. “As a leader, I believe in the power of we versus me. And so, I really am interested in the views of others, preferably diverse views.”

Reckless leaders may appear decisive, but their unwillingness to consider a variety of perspectives or adapt their approach leads to weaker decisions and diminished trust. Collaboration, however, is not synonymous with consensus.  In contrast, Laura describes her leadership philosophy as collaborative yet decisive, as striving for unanimous agreement can hinder progress: "Collaboration doesn’t mean I take the decision of the group. At the end of the day, the decision is mine to make." If her decision diverges from the team's recommendation, she makes a point to clearly explain her reasoning, reinforcing that the team's input is heard and valued, even if the final call differs.

Ask yourself: Am I confident in taking action myself, or is waiting for consensus stalling my process?

Leadership is a journey of growth, not perfection. It requires balancing confidence with humility, boldness with preparation, and collaboration with decisiveness. Laura’s insights remind us that intentional decision-making isn’t about playing it safe—it’s about embracing challenges with clarity and courage. The next time you're faced with a tough decision, remember: growth comes not from avoiding the leap, but from taking it.